I’ll be saying “her” because I’m raising little women, but I’m sure these can be applied to your son-raising parenthood as well. I believe that God works on us all the time, even when things are well. Since I’m in the thick of raising girls, most of them either entering or already into their wonder years, you can bet that we have dealt with our share of heartaches. At this point in life, much of these heartaches have been the result of typical “mean girl” drama. Not much of this is happening at the current moment, for which I am thankful. However, God continues to press some things on my heart.
When things have come up, and my daughter’s heart is aching because of female peers treating her unkindly, my first reaction is usually anger. I often feel helpless, and begin to imagine all the things I would do to “right” these wrongs, if only it wouldn’t send me straight to prison. Just kidding (sort of). As parents, we have intensely protective instincts, so its normal to want to immediately jump to the defense of your child. But the truth is, God, our Heavenly Father, is where we ought to turn, especially during these times. After all, the kids He has entrusted us with on this side of Heaven, are HIS, before they are ours. When you stop to think of that, its really hard to grasp and submit to, but its true.
What God tells me….what He plays on repeat….is “Tell her what is TRUE.” No matter the bully, no matter the heartache…..the age, the stage, the phase, the circumstance, no matter her surroundings, her class, her race, her family or friends, her past or her present, and no matter what she’s ever been told every day before….the TRUTH of who she is, will define her. And the truth of who she is, is this:
She is a child of God, made in His Holy image.
She is CALLED and CAPABLE.
She is LOVED and BELOVED.
She is here for a reason and she is made for GREAT PURPOSE.
Before the very foundation of the world, God chose her, and numbered the hairs on her head.
She was knit together in her mother’s womb, and she’s fearfully and wonderfully made.
She IS NOT ENOUGH. Stop telling her that she alone can do it all. ——> Hear this…..but with God, ALL things are possible.
Nothing at all will ever separate her from God’s love.
You, as her parents, are blessed and equipped to know her well. But she is only FULLY KNOWN by God.
Navigating parenthood is hard work. Think about how hard it is for your kid. Would you want to trade with them? I doubt it…. People love to say how hard “adulting” is, and even though the idea of flashing back to the happiest time of your own childhood sounds appealing at times, its good to be grown. As the parents, it is our job to try our best to give them the solid foundation they need, as they walk through life.
So often, its hard to know exactly how to build that foundation. But as I like to say, we are in the seed planting business. We mess up and plant rotten seeds sometimes, but thankfully, God’s grace is there for every single one of us. When you hear a whisper about your parenthood….that’s God. It takes practice to hear Him, and takes even more, to listen to Him. The older I get, the more aware I am of the God nudges coming my way. And lately, the message is clear:
“Tell her what is true.”